Throwing away the self-absorbed I.

It's August. A new month and a new beginning.

I went for my long break in mid-July. When I was away, people in the office were working their butts off. When I return to work on Wednesday, I promise myself that I will remain positive and smile even when the going gets rough. I have been too absorbed in my own problems at work till I couldn't see how the others are trying to cope and how tired they are.

Read a friend's entry earlier. It is only after reading her entry that I finally realised how she felt. I'm sorry if I seemed insensitive or too busy to care.

I do care.

---

There was once when I broke down in the office. Actually twice (I suddenly remembered the second time, haha). First time was when I ran to the office toilet to cry. The second time was at my cubicle after office hours, when a few friends saw me cry and came to comfort me.

I never wanted to cry in the office. Never. I promised myself that I would never cry publicly again. So I always brought the tears back home. Those were the days that when I got home from work, I would just go straight to the room, cry my heart out and then eat dinner in the living room like nothing was wrong. It was only early this year that I couldn't take it anymore. I was burnt out and just kept pretending that things were okay.

However, things did get better after a while. Then it became worse. Then it became better again. Then I got my long break. Which is actually not that long. =)(and why did we have to work till 9 p.m. that night!)

And it's now August. I tell myself that time passes. No matter how bad something is, like how badly I prepared for some presentation or how awful something was, time will pass and I will be doing something else very soon. Like the time when I was in the toilet crying, I knew I had to stop crying and then go back to my cubicle to do my work. Because it's only by facing the issue bravely that I will make the time pass by more meaningfully. And before I know it, I will be going home.

I know I don't practise it all the time but I will. I will, I will and I will!

Hope you cheer up and have a better week ahead!